How do hookup apps work? Matching, chat and meeting up

What a profile holds

Every hookup app starts with a profile, and the questions it asks show how the app expects people to find each other. AdultFriendFinder's sign-up records who you are (man, woman, couple, group or trans) and who you are looking for, and asks for country, state, nearest city and postal code. OkCupid asks 15 questions at sign-up out of 500+ in the app, then combines what each person wants with their answers to shared questions into a Match % score. Hinge uses prompt answers, photos and profile fields, and every match begins with a like or comment on a specific part of a profile.

Intent fields come next. Bumble has Intentions, Looking For and Interest Badges, and Badoo has Shared Intentions. Match has a Dating Intention filter and a Core Values feature. HUD adds My Bedroom preferences (into, open to, not into) and a Bedroom Archetype, which it says show compatibility before you match. How to fill these fields in is covered in writing a hookup profile.

How do hookup apps work: four ways to match

Mutual like

Tinder puts it in one sentence: "You can only match and chat when both people are interested." Plenty of Fish runs a swipe-style Meet Me, where a mutual right swipe is a match and opens chat. Badoo's Encounters shows one profile at a time, with a heart to like and a cross to pass.

DOWN changes what the swipe means. Swiping down says something casual, swiping up says something more, and a match forms when both people like each other, even if one swiped up and the other down. Feeld calls a mutual like a Connection and happn calls it a Crush. On happn a like stays secret unless the other person likes back, and the feed starts from people you have crossed paths with.

Some apps cap the stack. Coffee Meets Bagel sends a curated batch called Suggested around noon each day, and SCRUFF Match shows a new daily stack with an "Ask later" button that brings a profile back tomorrow. Bumble matches can expire, and its Premium offers to extend them by 24 hours.

Desire and interest tags

Feeld says Desires, interests and Reflections guide who you see, and that it will never rank profiles. Ashley Madison members search by filters and Interests and Desires tags, and its Discreet Match matches people who value privacy. Contact there goes through messages, Winks and Private Key Requests.

Personal ads

Pure is built on ads. You must post your own to see anyone else's, and the feed follows your preferences, location and filters, including Turn-ons. Likes are sent from the feed, and the "Looking for" field has five options.

A grid of nearby profiles

Grindr shows a grid of nearby profiles that you browse and message directly. Tags, filters and starred favorites narrow it down, its XTRA tier shows up to 600 profiles at once, and Unlimited shows unlimited profiles. SCRUFF also lets members browse nearby profiles and chat, and tapping "I'm Interested" tells you whether the attraction is mutual. Badoo's Discover also lets you browse nearby profiles.

eharmony and Match, both relationship-focused, lean on scores and curation. eharmony's Compatibility Quiz builds a personality profile and its algorithm shows partner recommendations with a compatibility score. Match chooses a daily set of profiles from compatibility and shared details.

Location

Grindr's terms say the service uses device location to show nearby users and to show you to them. Other users may see an approximate distance or a map position that is "generally offset from your actual location", though terms 4.2 warn that a sophisticated user may still estimate where you are. The privacy policy says Grindr may collect precise geolocation, so collecting a precise position and showing a blurred one are separate things.

Other apps handle it differently. HUD takes an approximate location (city and country) from an IP address lookup or from the device, includes it in the profile and uses it to match people within a range. happn shows roughly where two members crossed paths and never the other member's location, and members who decline geolocation must enter a city. Hinge says features that rely on precise geolocation are unavailable if you decline. HER lists See Who's Nearby as a Premium feature.

The pages on dating apps that match by location and apps that let you set another city collect what each app says.

Chat and paid extras

On Tinder, chat opens after a mutual match, and subscribers can send a compliment before matching. happn works the same way: chat opens only after a Crush, while a SuperCrush notifies someone and lets you send a private message first. Feeld Pings, Plenty of Fish First Contact (one a day) and OkCupid Intros all start a conversation before a match.

Media sits inside chat. Grindr has photo sharing and private albums that can be shared and unshared, and its privacy policy mentions audio and video calls between users. On Pure, chats carry photos, videos, voice messages, video calls and location sharing; photos and videos cannot be saved or screenshotted, and you are notified of screenshot attempts. HUD adds video calls with an optional auto-blur on cameras. Video chat lists the rest.

Several apps put a clock on the conversation. Pure chats expire after 24 hours unless both people turn the timer off. A Coffee Meets Bagel chat is open for an initial 7 days, and a closed one can be reopened with beans for 30 days. Ashley Madison makes message history unavailable after 90 days.

Paid tiers change who can write and what you see. Match free members can chat with every match, while paid tiers add unlimited introductions, read receipts and, on the top tier, Anti-Ghosting. Badoo Premium moves your sent messages to the top of the recipient's inbox, and HER Premium adds read receipts. Grindr Unlimited adds unsending messages and photos. On Ashley Madison, a member in some regions needs credits or a package to start a conversation. AdultFriendFinder sells separate Live Models shows with tokens or points. Prices are on the pricing pages, and best free hookup apps covers what costs nothing.

Verification

DOWN requires it: the FAQ says every person is photo-verified before they can swipe. Pure's Photo Verification badge is optional, takes under 30 seconds and needs no ID, and members can also ask for a "true photo" in chat. Plenty of Fish matches a video selfie to the main profile photo, and changing that photo means verifying again. Badoo asks for a selfie copying a gesture and then gives a blue checkmark. Bumble has a grey badge for Photo Verification and a blue badge for ID Verification, which Veriff runs.

A badge is not a background check. The terms of OkCupid and Plenty of Fish both say they run no criminal background or identity checks, and Coffee Meets Bagel says "We do not routinely verify the identity of our Users." Verification also moves data to vendors: Persona for Coffee Meets Bagel, Veriff for Bumble and Pure, Yoti for DOWN outside the US, and face geometry data at Hinge. The pages checked do not confirm a verification feature for AdultFriendFinder or Grindr. More apps are in apps that check photos.

How a meeting happens

The pages checked describe the tools that lead up to a meeting and stop there. Messages and calls come first, then the tools that confirm who is on the other end: video calls on Bumble, HUD and Badoo, a Photo Challenge photo swap on DOWN, a "true photo" request on Pure. On Pure, chat also supports location sharing.

Where two people meet and what each tells the other first is left to them. The staying safe when meeting from an app and the page on scams on dating apps cover that step.

Common questions